On Becoming The Big Cheese

Tears For Fears once declared that everybody wants to rule the world. This is an absolute truth if you’re a power mad megalomaniac. Although some folks would rather stay in the background, the thought of lording over everything is one dazzling temptation. Who wouldn’t want to have people shout hee-haw when you say jump?

A couple of months ago I was granted my own little private fiefdom. I was pretty cool about it, even self-deprecating I think, when people bring it up and offer their, well, congratulations. Of course that did not stop me from doing somersaults inside my head. To be honest I was walking with my head up in the clouds for a couple of days. Then reality set in and I got shot down from my imagined kingdom.

In the corporate world, along with great power comes a daily tidal wave of emails. This is so not what I had in mind. I was imagining myself in a pristinely fluffy bath robe (the kind where bed bugs can get lost in) lounging in a lazy boy getting a back rub while four lady attendants attend to my hands and feet. That’s how Al Capone worked when he’s not killing people, right?

Now people come to me for all things as if I could walk on water, or cure cancer, or for pete’s sake, as if I can predict the future! My goodness people, I know I’m hot but that doesn’t mean there’s enough of me for everyone. Yeah right, I wish I could say something like that.

Haay, 300+ emails to go, and the day is just starting.