I have yet to pack my bags, and I’m not ready to go.
I have a lot of apprehensions with this scheduled travel. For one, the pleasant routine I have established will be disrupted, and another, I’ll be leaving behind the comfort of my own home (no matter how sparsely populated it is). I know a lot of folks would want to be in my place right now, but that’s simply a knee-jerk reaction; a full blown desire based on the thirst for adventure but extremely lacking in foresight. A man can only value the things he has until he’s left it several times, or lost it altogether.
Leaving is something that I will never get used to. If only I could be in two places at the same time…
This time, I’ll be gone for at least 2 months. That amount of time is hardly a blip in my life’s superhighway. It’s a mountain I must climb to continue with the rest of my life’s journey. But that’s just the way it is. Nobody said that living is going to be easy. We have to do some very nasty stuff if we want to proceed to that higher place.
I had this discussion with a friend a couple of years ago. We were then in the same (now defunct) implementation team, and the role we had, involved a lot of regional travel. While we enjoyed the perks that go along with such a job, when we’re inebriated, the unspoken damage that frequent travel causes comes up to the surface. He said that every time he goes out of the country, he feels as if his life is put on hold. His real life (according to him) goes into suspended animation and is only resuscitated when he comes back.
I couldn’t help but feel that he was reading my thoughts. I share the same sentiment. But it’s not that bad I suppose, I have long ago considered these trips as one of my life’s adventures (not that my domestic life lacks excitement). Besides, it could be worse. I could be trapped in a dead-end job, or be just another statistic in the Philippines’ unemployment numbers. Clearly, I don’t want that. I still want to be a productive member of this country, and having this job is one of the ways for me to remain as one.
So here’s to necessary evils; may their occurrences be few and far in between, may our friendships survive the test of separation, and may we overcome the alienation of being away from our homes.
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